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Teaching kids to communicate their needs clearly and to wait patiently are important life skills. As parents, we influence and teach our children at any given moment. We are not always aware of the power we have to influence a child's behavior, so sometimes the behavior we have taught is not the one we wanted to teach. An example of this is the ability to delay gratification. On one hand, we want the child to learn to wait and on the other hand, we rush to serve them. These skills can be complicated with communication and behavior disorders. Any issues with your child, such as a learning disability or autism, should be flagged early on to allow for early intervention. Some parents notice issues around the time of preschool. Here are some behaviors to observe:
Impatience has several manifestations
Attempt to snatch
The child will try to snatch the object instead of waiting and receiving it.
Demonstration of aggression
This can happen when the adult tries to set boundaries. This is a challenging situation that makes it difficult for the child to immediately get the item they want.
Over-independence
The child will try to take the item alone in creative ways, even in irrational situations. The child will ask many times, will not always recognize the actions of the parent, or will not be able to wait. The child will continue to ask until they receive what they want.
Losing focus / easily distracted
Moving from one activity to another - the child can ask for something and until the parent gets organized and brings them the object, the child becomes preoccupied with other things and generally forgets what they asked for. It is also possible that the child will ask for something in particular and after a moment will ask for something else.
A child can exhibit one of these behaviors when their environment (mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, siblings) strives to satisfy their desires quickly.
Is communication the problem?
Generally, the goal is to teach the child to wait patiently and for you to be patient with them. When it comes to a child who has a communication problem, the reality is even more complex. In these cases, the parent does not always know what the child wants and the child in turn fails to describe and explain what they actually want. Communication disorders require professional diagnosis and treatment.
Autism is a very common issue in the world and some of the above problems may not be related to the spectrum at all, but as a parent is important to be aware of these symptoms as well as your child’s activities and behaviors. The more you can get to know your child, the better chance you'll have of being able to assist them. Once they are in school, they will be dealing with more stressful situations; therefore, teaching your kids how to communicate their needs clearly and delay gratification are valuable skills to have.
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